Happy Hump Day!

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Hurray!  Thank goodness we’ve made it to another Hump Day! Okay, ladies, lemme hear you sound off.  What would you do if you found out your man was stripping for a living?  Would you be upset and ready to throw in the towel or would you stand by his side?  If so, what would you do if you found out he was raking in four thousand dollars a weekend?

 

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Happy Hump Day!

 

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Ladies, if your man asked you to stay home and play hooky so y’all could make love all day, would you? If spontaneity is missing from your love-life and he took the initiative, you better get to dialing. I have a friend who said she’d feel guilty staying home. “I don’t wanna waste my sick leave,” she says. “There’s nothing we can do now, that we can’t do later”, she says.  I’m just saying, if your man comes up with the idea to stay home and put it down, and you really love him like you say you do, go ‘head and get your best sick voice on. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with stacking your paper, but there is definitely nothing wrong with a little work hooky every now and again. Don’t lose sight of the big picture which is intimacy. Otherwise you may find yourself, by yourself.

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Couple Cuddling in Bed --- Image by © Dann Tardif/LWA/Corbis

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Happy Hump Day!

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Here we are again at another Hump Day classic.  Ladies, would you knowingly exchange cellphones for a day with your significant other?  Do you have something to hide?  Men, if you realized you left your cellphone home and your girl had access to it, would you continue to keep it moving and move to Mexico?

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Happy Hump Day!

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Thank goodness we’ve made it to another Hump Day!  Let me ask you something. Could you tolerate working with your spouse/better half?  I conducted a survey of 30 people, men and women.  Surprisingly, 3/4 of the women polled replied with a resounding NO!  As a matter of fact, they said, ‘Hell No.’  Seems like women, though they love their men, could not fathom the thought of working with their baes.  The men also responded, no.  And without going into too much detail, we already know the reason for their response. “She’d get in the way,” said one surveyed. “Bruh, she would fuck up my whole game,” responded another. “Ninja, are you crazy?” said yet another.  Call me crazy, but you would be more than surprised to find out 1/4 of the 3/4 of women shared the same sentiments with no desire to work with their lovers. For anonymity’s sake, let’s call one young lady polled, Celeste.  Celeste admitted she loves to flirt at work and knows good and damn well her man wouldn’t go for that. She said she enjoys the attention other men pay her and believes you can look at the menu, as long as you don’t order.  Personally, I think that’s playing with fire, but yeah, who am I to judge?  Then there’s Brenda, who shall remain nameless, who is currently having relationship problems and has her eye on a certain co-worker who she feels is a fantastic candidate to be her next boyfriend.  She said she’s just waiting on her current boyfriend to mess up just one more time, and she’ll be on from the ex, to the next.  I personally wouldn’t want to work with my spouse simply because when she asks me how my day was, I want to give the highlights of the drama, the bullshit, the backstabbing, and the office politics she knows nothing about.  Otherwise, she knows just how my day went, ’cause she was right there amidst it all.

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Happy Hump Day!

 

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Ladies, have you ever thought a man was gay just because he didn’t sleep with you?  If so, why?  Years ago, I went out alone to a local club to catch a performance of a female recording artist I was dying to see.  Once I was able to make my way inside, I ordered a drink and stood at the bar.  A young lady asked me what time the show was going to start.  I wasn’t  too sure what time the show was going to start but I told her most performances at that particular venue didn’t start until 11PM.  She appeared to be there alone as well, so I offered her a drink. We stood there and chit-chatted for an hour until the show started.  I was a perfect gentleman.  Once the show started we made our way closer to the stage and danced a little as we caught the show.  There was an after-party we both went to.  To myself, I was thinking I found someone I could chill with, a hang out partner, someone to dance with at future parties.  She was thinking something else.  She was mad cool but I wasn’t really feelin’ her like that.  A few weeks passed by, and we hung out a few times until one night she invited me to sleepover after a night of dancing. I politely declined stressing it was easier for me to stay at a relative’s house which was closer to my job.  The next day I called her, but she didn’t answer.  I left a few messages just to check up on her, to which she never replied.  After two weeks I called a friend of hers to make sure she was ok and her friend told me our mutual friend was very upset at me for not acknowledging her advances and told all of her friends that I must have been gay.  Furthest thing from the truth.  Here’s what I never understood since that day. If a man sleeps with every women he meets, he’s a dog.  If he chooses not to sleep with a particular woman, he’s labeled gay.  For all those women out there with that small-minded thinking; what about a man that has outgrown running the streets and playin’ games, has a preference of a woman he’s attracted to, thinks better of himself and is looking for something more meaningful than just casual sex.  Stop being miserable.  Has it ever occurred to you, maybe he’s just not that into you.

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Happy Hump Day!

 

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TGiHD….Thank Goodness it’s Hump Day.  And not a minute too soon.  Ladies, what would you rate your oral sex game on a scale of 1 to 10?  And more importantly, what special trick or technique have you learned that rates your game supreme?  Amongst friends, do you brag about your skills? Would you confess to a man on your first date how your oral sex skills are on the chart?

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Happy Hump Day!

 

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Ladies, do you enjoy role playing?  What would you like to act out with your lover?  The sexy maintenance man?  The horny housewife?  What about the police officer and the naughty prisoner?   Well, whatever tickles your fancy, let loose and get as creative as you possibly can.  I particularly  like the club scenario role.   I would go out to a lounge, order a few drinks, socialize a bit and in would walk in my baby.  She’d come in looking good as all get out.  From head to toe, sexy as fcuk. I’d sit back and watch a few guys approach her and one after another, get shot down.  I’d sit back and watch a few women approach her and one after another, get shot down.  While conversing with another brother, I’d order her a drink and have it sent to her…

“She bad, ain’t she?

“Fuck yeah.  Since the minute shorty walked in I couldn’t take my eyes off her,” I said.

“She killin’ it bruh.  You sending her a drink?  I wouldn’t do it bruh, she playin’ hard to get,” said the young cat.

“I know exactly what a woman like that wants and needs,” I said before walking over to her table.

“Well, shit…tell a nigga your ancient Chinese secret.”

“Hi.  Is anyone sitting here with you?”  I asked.

She looked up over the rim of her glass, “To be honest, I am here on a blind date a friend of mine set up, but he’s late.  Please, sit down.  I want to thank you for the drink.  That was very kind of you.”

“The pleasure was mine.  Hi, my name is Takoma.  What’s yours?”

“Niecy.  Takoma?  That’s a nice name.  It’s different.  Where are you from, Takoma?”

“Your dreams.”  I replied.

“Excuse me.”

“Your dreams.  I don’t know what it is, but I get this feeling that you’ve been waiting for a man that completes you.  A man that knows exactly how to touch you, knows exactly how to quench that fire that burns deep within you.  I’m not physic by a long shot, but I’m compelled to love you the way you need to be loved.”

“I see you’re very confident.  You must tell that to all the women in here,” she said as she took a sip from her glass.

“This guy that you’re supposed to meet tonight, has he shown up?”

“No,” she said as she looked around, then at her watch.

“Exactly.  If it were meant to be between you and Mr. Mystery, he’d be here now.  That is his loss, for real.”

“Now I don’t believe in magic, so don’t go pulling no rabbits out your hat. I am not in the mood for that.”

“I hear exactly what you saying, ma.  I ain’t about games and far from Houdini,” I said as I looked her deep within her eyes.

“I believe in love everlasting,” she said as she leaned in towards me.

“I’m available for whatever you need, whatever you want.”

She stood up for the table, and took me by the hand.  We walked through the thick crowd towards the back of the lounge.   The line to the ladies room was incredibly long.  Niecy looked left and then right and pulled me into the men’s room with the quickness.  A few men stood shocked at the presence of a woman in the men’s room.  With her still holding my hand, she knocked on  door after door until she found an empty stall.  She snatched me inside, locked the door and kissed me passionately.  She  kneeled down and unzipped my zipper, reached in and pulled out my rigid dick.  She slowly closed her eyes as she began sucking my dick deliciously.  She held my balls and slurped me from base to tip all the while looking right at me.   It was a complete and absolute turn on and I was ready to cum right then and there, but I held back.  She jerked my dick with two hands as she gently kissed the head and flicked her tongue up and down the shaft.  She stood up  and slowly hiked her dress over her sweet wide hips, turned around, placed her  hands on the wall and spread her legs.  With one hand on her shoulder, I took hold of my dick and slowly stuck it in her wet cunt.  I felt the extreme heat of her pussy melt on my dick.  She let out a slow and long moan that made my dick harder.  She looked over her shoulder at me, reached back and grabbed me by my right hip and forced me deep into her.  With each long and deliberate stroke, I could feel her pussy get wetter and wetter.  Amidst the clammer of guys outside the stall listening and cheering, we were in our own world.  We were completely silent except our heavy panting as we fucked like horny animals.  She placed one foot on the toilet seat as I pounded her juicy pussy.  In all the frenzy, my dick slipped out of her pussy and she squirted so much on the floor that I thought she was pissing.  She closed her eyes, unbuttoned her blouse, reached into her bra and took her tits out to kiss her own nipples.  She lowered her head and forcibly threw her fat ass back onto the shaft of my thick and rigid dick.  She fell silent as I felt her entire body quiver with orgasm after orgasm.  My dick got harder with the scent of her sweet cummin’ pussy.  After her waves of orgasms, she took my dick in her mouth and sucked me slowly with delicious intensity.

“Fuck, baby…baby..baby!   Yeah, this what you what?  Fuck, you gonna make me cum!!”

“Yeeess.  Give it to me daddy.  I want it all.  I want to taste it right now.”

I knew she was close and within a few more strokes of her tongue, I was gonna cum in her mouth.

“Okay…you nasty bitch, here it cums.  Yeah…fuck!  Ahhhh!” I shouted as I came in her mouth.

She moaned with closed eyes as she swallowed my entire hot load.

“C’mon.  Let’s go home.  I want some fuckin’ more,” she said as she unhooked the latch and led me by the hand through the guys that were peeping over the stall door.

 

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Happy Hump Day!

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Greetings one and all.  Well, we’ve made it to yet another Hump Day.  Ok ladies, here’s this week’s question. Would you, or could you date your male OB/GYN doctor? And if you did date him, would you be secure enough to know he’s not quitting his practice just because you two are dating.  Now let’s fast forward into the future 6 months, and you ask him how is day went. Will you be secure enough within yourself if he shares the events of his day?

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Episode 508

Smiling mixed race doctor in scrubs

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Happy Hump Day!

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I’ve already covered a Hump Day question about female pubic hair, so what about body hair on a woman, more specifically, unshaven legs.  I am sure there may be plenty of people that will say it’s disgusting and unfeminine, and each and everyone of you are entitled to your opinion, and I appreciate that, but again I remind you, everything has its purpose.  It’s only Western civilization that frowns upon woman who let their underarm and leg hair grow. For women who shave, hey, that’s completely your prerogative and it totally your decision to endure the discomfort of waxing and the mundane task of frequent shaving. Ladies, ask yourself this question, if no one were to judge you, would you allow your hair to grow?  If so, go on free yourself of yet another chore of this so-called Western standard of beauty. No need to ask what my preferences are…I’m a man of a certain age and like a lot of shit, so…the more hair the better.  Like pubic hair on a woman, hairy legs really turn me on.  And don’t let a woman have that thin line of hair that travels from her navel all the way down to her bush!  OMG, I love that shit!  It definitely brings out the animal in me.  And if you release the animal in me, get ready for some good sweaty, jungle love type of fucking. I’m just sayin’.

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